Fake it 'till You Make it

This phrase is pretty cliche by now and I'm pretty sure I've even used it a couple times but I was thinking the other day about how destructive this saying really is. The problem is the faking part. We live in a world that is full of fake and I find it really disgusting. We fake our appearances, our friendships, our relationships, our work etc. and now we're encouraged to fake our feelings or who we are? Something about that just rubs me the wrong way.

How would faking my feelings ever benefit me in anyway? How would it ever benefit the people around me? Sure, it may make me look better or more in control of my life. It may make my life easier to deal with for a day but I'm just not convinced that it would truly help me. Fake it 'till you make it tells you to fake confidence and eventually you'll exude it so much that you'll actually have it. To me this seems a little far fetched. Fake it 'till you make it says pretend that you're over him and eventually you'll be over him. I have no problem with habit that becomes reality because that's the way life is. You do something enough times and it becomes a part of your life. And I don't doubt that truth behind this phrase, it's just the principle behind it. If faking it becomes habit the only natural response is that you'll become fake. If you fake confidence, it's not real, genuine confidence. If you fake happiness, it's not true. That's my problem. I think that world has enough fake in it. I think it needs more real. I think we all deserve to be real, honest and genuine. We all deserve to have real friends and we deserve to be able to feel what we feel and work through it the best we know how. That's what I believe this concept takes away from us. It takes reality away and tells us that it's so much better to be fake.

I would much rather work through messy emotions and imperfections that try to be what I'm not. I've been learning that accepting who I really am (even the faults) makes me so much happier. I'm not so disappointed when I fail because I know what I'm capable of and comfortable with. Let me tell you, this makes me want to overcome my failures even more. It doesn't discourage me. I know and accept that I'm not the most outgoing or social person so I don't put this false expectation on myself when I'm in social environments. I am who I am and faking who I'm not isn't going to help me in any way. That's just the way life is. Accept who you are and go from there. Don't ever try to be who you wish you were. You don't have to be and do everything all at once, the beauty in life is that you grow and growth takes time. Faking growth isn't really growing, it's shrinking. Faking growth robs you of the experience.

Why do everything in our own strength when we're clearly not strong enough to overcome our faults. We can't do it by ourselves and faking it isn't going to make us stronger - honesty will.